The Specious Report 2001
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December
Bush Reverses Pardon; Executions Set for Christmas Eve
Fruitcake Air-Drop Spurred Anti-U.S. Sentiment
 Upside to High Unemployment: Morons Get Fired First
NFL Players Adopt "Afghan Free Agent" Rule
Bin Laden May Be Using Disguise for December Travel

November
 Russian President Eats Bush Chili, Can't Stop Putin
Bin Laden Boasts Flying Carpet, Magic Lantern Technology
Dallas Kops Receive Keystone Award
 MicroSoft Buys A, E, I, O and U; Sometimes Y and W
Scientists Believe Humpback Whale Songs are Hip-Hop
Metal Band "Anthrax" Changes Name to "Permanent Ear Damage"
CIA Collaborates with Hollywood on Plan to Protect Skyscrapers

October
Hallmark Shelves "Snowy" Christmas Card Idea
Makers of Glad Bags Introduce Zip-Lock Casual Wear
Dead Terrorists Go on Shopping Spree
 Kabul Experiencing Shortage of Clean Underpants
Slim-Fast Linked to Deafness
 Capitol Hill Interns Test Positive for Vaginal Anthrax
Oil Industry Urges Bush to Bomb Elsewhere
Bush Pledges to Flush Out Osama Glen Livet & The Evil Dewars
 God Makes His Position Clear to Osama bin Laden

The Specious Report 1789
The Specious Report: Volume 1, Number 1

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