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Minolta Introduces Butt-Friendly Copier

Stamford, CT  |  In a move to capture the lucrative 18 to 24 year old buyers market, Minolta Technologies has introduced a copier designed specifically to accommodate people wanting to xerox their buttocks.

Xerox Your Butt The ARSe-2020 system is a combination scanner, fax machine and high-speed RGB laser printer, capable of up to 30 copies per minute.

In addition to boasting higher resolution and truer flesh tones, the object window is made of a new hypoallergenic Plexiglas. It is thin but remarkably strong, and slightly contoured.

When attached to the optional storage base, the entire unit is only three feet high, for stabilization and more comfortable seating.

Priced under $700, marketing will be aimed at college libraries and Gen-X dot com businesses. Also under development is a bankcard-operated version for placement in retail locations like Kinko's and Hooters.

All original content on The Specious Report © Dale McFarland  Political Satire  Redistribution limited to excerpts for non-commercial use only.