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Pop-Up Windows Inventor Won't Stay Buried

The Hague, NL  |  Undertakers are puzzled and irritated by a coffin that refuses to stay underground. After numerous attempts to inter the body, cemetery staff is at a loss.

Verdomde Klootzak, the Dutch html developer credited with scripting the earliest pop-up window codes, was found violently murdered in his home weeks ago. Authorities have no solid leads in the strange case, and this latest enigma has served only to hamper their investigation.

Grounds manager Vlad Diggoort expressed his frustration. "We close the box and we think we're rid of him, then he pops up somewhere else. We bury the bastard over here, but then he reappears over there. It's driving us all crazy."

Tim Berners-Lee, Klootzak's former co-worker at C.E.R.N. on the French-Swiss border west of Geneva, has no explanation for the mystery.

"Frankly, I'm bewildered," he confesses. "I'm sure they'll be able to dispose of the casket eventually. But I wouldn't be surprised if his murderer is never identified. There are just too many people in the world who wanted him to disappear."

All original content on The Specious Report © Dale McFarland  Political Satire  Redistribution limited to excerpts for non-commercial use only.