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Air Guitar Collection a Total Lost in Garage Fire

Parma, OH  |  Thirty-six year old Steven "Stoner" McGarry's worst fears were confirmed after an early-morning fire swept through the contents of his parents' garage, including his stockpile of over 60 air guitars.

McGarry's one-room apartment over the garage, which he calls his "bachelor penthouse," received only minor smoke damage.

The fire and water damage on the ground floor left him grateful his own life was spared, but he acknowledged the loss of his priceless imaginary collection will be hard to get over.

air guitar collection "I've been collecting and trading for 20 years," McGarry recounted. "Most of those guitars are irreplaceable. A lot of wonderful memories went up in smoke that night." He believes the fire may have been caused by a smoldering cigarette left behind after a "band" rehearsal.

The collection, which was not insured, included rare items like a "Fender Stratocaster" that he often used to mimic Stevie Ray Vaughan, and a "Gibson 350T" he once brought out while seated in an actual Chuck Berry concert audience. But his "favorite axe" was unquestionably his "1957 Flying V" with which he had won several air guitar competitions.

"I still have the Ovation Pinnacle Deluxe I use around the apartment with my clock radio," he said. "And I discovered one of my Ibanez acoustics under the bed the day after the fire. But all my electrics were down in the garage with the stereo."

McGarry has little hope any other pieces will be recovered. "I can only pray that one of the other guys may have taken one home with him after the rehearsal."

All original content on The Specious Report © Dale McFarland  Political Satire  Redistribution limited to excerpts for non-commercial use only.